Proud to Be an American

Ursula sighs, “This is all so profit-oriented, so corporate, so American.” The last word she says hangs in her mouth. She gags on its poisonous resonance. “I prefer to go my own way, make my on rules. I don’t need some corporation telling me what to do.”

Travis sits, stunned for a moment, then says, “If anything is American it’s your attitude toward things American. Individualism, arrogance, pride, a lack of respect for tradition and institutions.”

“Wh-what are you saying?” Ursula’s voice quivers.

“You’re more American than any of us.”

Ursula falls to her knees and screams, “NNNNOOOOOooooo!”

“Overly-dramatic. Totally American.”