“Greetings. I am Lucius Gracchus Scipio Bibulus and this is the Situationtorium! Our top story: Christianity. Innocent offshoot of Judaism, or dangerous cannibalistic society? With me this evening: Sextus Julius Africanus, Christian advocate.”
“Lucius, it is preposterous to call Christianity a cannibalistic society.”
“Well, it is reported that on regular intervals Christians eat the body and blood of a crucified Jewish insurrectionist. Sounds like cannibalism to me, Africanus.”
“It’s symbolic. They’re just eating bread and wine, and calling it body and blood.”
“You heard it here first. Christians aren’t even good cannibals. This is the Roman News Network. Veni, vidi, reportavi.“
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